>>17185How do I get this off my mind, cut most ties and for the most part vanished now, but I cannot stop thinking about it, part of me wants to go back, fight, try to fix things, call out this new bullshit, a deeper part of me is far angrier and wants to do far worse. But that would achieve nothing, probably just get people hurt emotionally, and get nothing done. I feel like failure, I tried to create happy things and comfortable things and instead people are miserable, hate it but want something similar.
But all I wan't to do is bury my head in my coding book and finally learn some code, but I cannot focus, at all, I can barely get through a paragraph without my mind wandering back to it. This chapter is supposed to take an hour, im four pages in an hour later. I really want to stop thinking about it
I might try getting a friend to come over, help distract me, might go out for a bit too when its daylight, run some errands, im usually better at forgetting things when im in a social situation where i have to, outside interacting with people